Everton to stop titting about.

Everton have decided that at some point in the near future it’s probably time to stop titting about. A spokesman confirmed the club’s new position:

To be fair, I think it’s harsh to say we’ve been titting about. I mean, yes we’ve wasted a hundred million on unnecessary transfers we didn’t need, bought too many players that want to play in the same position, didn’t sign a replacement striker or replace an ageing defence, dithered over sacking a manager who had lost the plot, and didn’t have a plan in place when we did sack him.

Yes we may have humiliated ourselves with one of the worst ever campaigns in Europe, had players arsing about in training, playing badly, out of position, or just not trying. And okay, we haven’t got a clue what we’re going to do about the manager’s position. But at worst, all of that’s a bit of light-hearted banter.

We’ll sort it out in the near future. But it will be after the Merseyside derby – we won’t be cancelling that yearly pantomime for anyone.